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[arnold]

On my way to Seattle to see if once and for all the new doc can figure out what is wrong with me. An no, you Mississippi back woods noodleheads, it aint a mental thing, thou some would argue.
So onto security and into the booth. EEEEEEEEEEEGGGGHHHH. Step back please. EEEEEGGGGHHHHH. Do you have any metal on you? No Mam. Go thru again slowly. EEEEEEGGGGHHHHHHHH. The alarm goes off again.
Please step off to the side. And so I get wanded and patted down. No big deal, took all of 45 seconds. I really don't see what all the howling is about. If you pansies don't like it, then don't fly. I'm surprised that those Mississippi dwellers aren't buying tickets just so they can get a pat down and can tell all of their buddies at the next road kill roast that they got lucky.
And ya know, if something happened, all of these weenies that you see whining on the news would be the first to bitch that we are not doing enough.
So with that said, in honor of Mississippi, I'm gonna leave my watch on just so I can get patted down again. And then tell all you god old boys that I "got lucky" twice in one week!

[whitewolf]

Hey Arnold  do we get to pick a beautiful 25 year old woman to get patted down-if so ill go for the pat down 3/4 times-and then if i have time ill come back around and go for the 5th pat down.  yaaaaa. WW

[arnold]

You being a Marine would probably be able to make that a request. With my dear wifey working fo rthe TSA, I don't think I would be able to pull that off

[whitewolf]

Arnold-OK-ill tell you one thing the female security at the European airports -oh lordy
pat me-hehehhe
WW

[Kentbob]

As I understand it, the pat down from failing the metal detectors is significantly different from the pat down used if someone refuses the full body scan.


Kent

[Scott]

But...nobody has told me I get paid baggage handler's fee for a pat down 

[Dawg]

On my way to Seattle to see if once and for all the new doc can figure out what is wrong with my. An no, you Mississippi back woods noodleheads, it aint a mental thing, thou some would argue.

You know, I get kind of teary-eyed when you talk sweet about me like that!

I'm surprised that those Mississippi dwellers aren't buying tickets just so they can get a pat down and can tell all of their buddies at the next road kill roast that they got lucky.

If they would lower the price of tickets and throw in a free beer during the pat down, we most certainly would!

So with that said, in honor of Mississippi, I'm gonna leave my watch on just so I can get patted down again. And then tell all you god old boys that I "got lucky" twice in one week!

Although even an extremely thorough pat down would really only qualify as foreplay, we would let you slide with calling it "getting lucky". Due to your condition and all.

That's what Southern hospitality is all about!

[arnold]

YEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[Joe Hubbard]

[Dawg]

Nice sign!

But, Uncle Arnold needs a T-shirt that states "Please Touch My Junk!"

If he breaks your arm afterward, you'll know you need need to work on your Junk-Touching qualifications.

I betcha Ol' Wanker has a Junk-Touching Certification Program in his list of courses; the TSA ought to seek his expertise in their mission to be expert "baggage handlers".

Just a thought.

[arnold]

My dear wifey is at the airport today with specific instructions from me to keep a close eye on individuals from Mississippi who insist on going thru security numerous times. The boys from down south need something to talk about to the close family members, which average 300 in the "normal" family, during the Thanksgiving road kll roast. Ah, the scent of roast weasel and pumpkin pie, all washed down with the neighbors corn liquor! Please save me some pie and corn liquor....

[whitewolf]

Arnold- if your wife is on the job and a guy comes through   (very big) with a t shirt that says "Dawg" on the front - call for back up - he is just a big lovable former sailor who likes to raise hell....He wamted to be a Marine but -oh well..
WW

[Dawg]

WW,
Actually...I did visit the Marine recruiter before I enlisted in the Navy. Long story on why I chose Navy over Marines; remind me next time we get together and I'll tell the tale over a couple of adult beverages.

Uncle Arnold,
You got something against roast weasel?
I can think of a couple of different weasels I wouldn't mind roasting over the holidays. I doubt I'd eat them, but a long, slow roasting of their miserable hides would be sure to put me in a jolly mood for the season.

[whitewolf]

Hey brother Dawg-actually I am all for the Navy-great outfit-seya- WW

[arnold]

Reis, Pelosi, Boxer should all be on a spit..
Have a safe holiday